12.27.12 1:46am salad and ranch 75
And also I have rejoined the YMCA by my house and am going to go every day after work and bun at least 600 calories. and at work I am going to do crunches every 30 mins. And tan on my lunch break instead of eating.
How much can u lose in 22 days??
22days until Jamaica.
3months 6days until my birthday.
I have failed the abc diet two times now. I have to get it together and lose weight. I will not eat anything except salad from now on. And only 1 cup at a time. Oh and apples. I’m in a raw vegan diet now.
ABC diet take 2, day 4, 7:30 am
I can have 400 calories today, I already burned 250 calories on the elliptical and I am drinking a v8 fusion (50cal) Im so tired, I feel horrible and gross, and I only have 26 days until Jamaica, and only 3 months 9 days until I turn 20.
and its awkward growing up, and having to decide what to be, and who to be, and how to be it. I was never any good at decisions anyway, but the pressure of having to make decisions like these, -well, its no good for me. But maybe the person I aspire to be is a good decision-maker. Maybe, the person I aspire to be, can construct beautiflu 3 page long grammatically correct sentences. Maybe the person I aspire to be is right here beneath the surface of the current me, and if I get enough culture and knowledge and decide on some basic things about me, and I can look through the glass surface and shatter it with my personality that has bloomed into the real me. And then there I am, me. The person I aspire to be, making tolstoy look like a childrens book, making outfits worthy of the duchess of cambridge, there I will be in my full butterfly wings and flying so far from my cocoon and free.
The best feeling in the world, knowing I have the world in my hands. Knowing I can do anything I want. Its 85 degrees outside, Farenheit. I am driving way too fast, with all the windows down, classic aviator sunglasses on, my hair is crazy, all over the place, stinging my face. I can feel the sun on my arms and my face and it feels like life. Life, it feels like I want this moment to last forever, this feeling of really being alive. The spedometer says 95, better slow down or the police might try to get me, but even then I woudn’t mind, because nothing can touch me, nothing can bring me down. Invincible. The feeling of being 19 and driving way too fast, with music way too loud, and I’m screaming along lyrics I know in my soul, bob marley, bob dylan, eddie cochran, and its 85 outside and there are little beads of sweat between my breasts, but I feel cool because I own the world.